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Original 7000


It used to be,

50 years ago or so,

that if you wanted to be different than everybody else,

you could just change your name to Moonbeam,

sport a green Mohawk,

buy clothes in the next town,

get a tattoo,

take up yoga.


And fuddy-duddies would stare and fuss,

cause they thought you were whack-ass,

and you could kick back,

secure in the knowledge that everybody knew

who the biggest freak was in the neighborhood!


But nowadays,

there's like 100 Moonbeams in the phonebook,

Austin's 2003 slam champion was named Moonbeam! (da'shade)

and everybody's got piercings all over their bodies,

green hair flying in all directions like snowflake-matrices,

as they all do yoga!


And no matter how far you drive,

you can't find a cool kilt,

that you don't see on someone else within the week.


And see,

I think the problem is that there're just too many people in the world these days,

4 times more than just 100 years ago;

so even if you're one in a million,

there're 7000 other people just like you.


If you wanna be different now,

you have to multiply everything you do by 70,

you gotta make your own clothes from your own designs and dye them yourself,

you need 100 piercings

all on your feet,

and a branding

on your face,

start a radioactive monster truck driver hypnotist school

and join the church of the flying spaghetti monster!


and ok,

I'm all for expressing yourself,

but it seems like at some point,

you cross this line where you're spending more time appearing to be unique,

than actually doing something different;


more time admiring your armor than slaying dragons;

more time polishing your Porsche than driving it;

more time showing off the symbol than worshiping the god.


and if I was an summer blockbuster movie on its opening day,

I hope my commercials and previews would be funny and thought provoking,

they would draw you into the theater-

but once you were inside,

you would find that I was even better than you expected,

because all that flash is no substitute for content.


So maybe I will get a branding on my face;

pierce my nose again,

with elephant tusks;

don a dolphin's dorsal fin,

and wear black leather bondage gear all the time.


But no matter what I look like,

please judge me by my actions,

and not by my style.



  (c) Copyright 2005, Daniel Strack

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